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cowboygreg (321211)

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Trying to unscrew the inscrutable
A man with a mission... but without a clue

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Name:

Greg

Website:

The Cowboy Greg FAQ

Location:

Valencia, California, United States

Birthdate:

1961-03-09

LJ Talk:

cowboygreg

livejournal.com (Jabber)

AOL IM:

cowboygreg (Add Buddy, Send Message)

ICQ UIN:

19689986 (User Profile)

MSN Username:

cowboygreg

aol.com

Bio:

Howdy, folks. I'm Greg, just another denizen of that amazing agglomeration of strange people called Southern California.

[pause to allow catcalls, jeers, and scattered applause from the audience to die out]

So what distinguishes me from all the other guys out there? Apart from my amazing penchant for smartass comments, that is? Well, let's see. I'm a happily partnered gay man (of that peculiar group known as "Bears"), living with my woofy husbear Don in Valencia, one of the nicer suburbs of Los Angeles. To pay the bills, I do database administration, Unix system administration, minor bits of code hacking, and various and sundry other tasks for a Major Motion Picture Studio. (No glamour here – I sit in a cubicle all day and stare into a monitor. Occasionally I’ll mutter something to myself). When I'm not in my cubicle staring at a monitor and muttering to myself, I'll be reading. Or writing fiction, or weightlifting, or messing around with computers on my own time, or indulging any of a number of more minor interests. I've been described as Calvin from "Calvin and Hobbes", all grown up, which has more than a little truth to it. But I've had to swear off my morning bowl of Chocolate-Frosted Sugar Bombs, darn it.

I have a rich inner fantasy life, and a sense of humor which I maintain is dry and everybody else tells me is just plain weird. Unlike Calvin, though, I tend to be laid-back most of the time (as befits a L.A. native son). I do have a temper (oh, boy, do I have a temper... blame the Irish for that one), but generally it flares up and vanishes without a trace in about five minutes or so, then I get all laid-back again. I am a walking bundle of contradictions -- I'm simultaneously positive and optimistic, prone to moodiness, and not at all sparkly and perky. I can be blandly naïve one second and cuttingly acerbic the next. I do not suffer fools gladly. My ancestry is pure Colonial Mutt (partaking of Irish, Swedish, British, Scots, and Italian, in that order), which means I have a large variety of stereotypical behaviors to choose from at any given moment. *grin*

I have the uncanny ability to start a fire by rubbing two dry words together.

I am not "cool", decidedly not "hip", and in sync with the trend du jour only by the purest accident.

Some people have called me weird. I won't argue the point. :)

My personal philosophy, insofar as I’ve got one, would probably be the Wiccan credo: “An’ ye harm none, do as ye will”. I believe it’s essential to not only pay kindnesses done to you by others back, but to pay them forward as well. Since what goes around comes around, it's only common sense to put out there only that which you'd like to get (although, to be honest, there are times when I honor this one more in the breach than the obeyance).

If there's anything else you might conceivably need to know about me, go ahead and ask.

Caution: Posts may be made before ingestion of sufficient caffeine to ensure coherency. Posts may include any or all of the following: Half-baked theories, speculative physics or other scientific or technological disciplines, ranting, unorthodox political opinions, or lame-ass attempts at punditry. I do not promise to wear any tinfoil hats sent to me. *grin*

DISCLAIMER: Please read all instructions and warnings before use. Enter at your own risk. Void where prohibited by law. Batteries not included. Cowboy Greg may settle during shipment. Any resemblance of Cowboy Greg to persons living or dead is purely coincidental. Use Cowboy Greg only as directed. For indoor or outdoor use only. Do not use Cowboy Greg while operating a motor vehicle or heavy equipment. Cowboy Greg may be too intense for some viewers. Cowboy Greg contains no user-serviceable parts inside. Cowboy Greg contains small parts and is not intended for use by children under the age of eighteen. Cowboy Greg was originally recorded on analog equipment. Please remain seated and keep arms and legs inside at all times until Cowboy Greg comes to a full and complete stop. In the unlikely event of a water landing, Cowboy Greg can be used as a flotation device. As seen on TV. One size fits all. Slippery when wet. No substitutions allowed. Caveat emptor. Cowboy Greg is provided "as-is" without warranty. Reader assumes full responsibility. If any defects are discovered, do not attempt to fix them yourself, but return Cowboy Greg to an authorized service center. Read at your own risk. Text may contain explicit materials some readers may find objectionable; parental guidance is advised. Cowboy Greg is sold by weight, not by volume. Cowboy Greg has been sanitized for your protection. Do not use Cowboy Greg with a petroleum based lubricant. No animals were harmed in the preparation of this weblog. Cowboy Greg contains no CFCs. Discontinue use of Cowboy Greg if nausea or dizziness occurs. Unix is a registered trademark of AT&T. Do not fold, spindle or mutilate. Cowboy Greg contains a glowing green substance that fell to Earth, presumably from outer space (commonly referred to as Diet Mountain Dew). Your mileage may vary. Do not puncture, incinerate, or store Cowboy Greg above 120 degrees Fahrenheit. Cowboy Greg may adhere to certain types of skin. Do not expose Cowboy Greg to antimatter.

Do not taunt Happy Fun Cowboy Greg.

Disclaimer does not cover misuse, accident, lightning, flood, tornado, tsunami, volcanic eruption, earthquake, hurricanes, vengeful angels of destruction, Armageddon, or other acts of God; neglect, damage from improper use, incorrect line voltage, unauthorized use, unauthorized repair or improper installation; typos or other errata; broken antenna or marred cabinet; missing or altered serial numbers; electromagnetic radiation pulse effects arising from the detonation of any fission, fusion, or antimatter-based explosive device; sonic boom vibrations; customer adjustments that are not covered in this list; incidents arising from an airplane crash, ship sinking or taking on water, or motor vehicle crash; damage caused by dropping the item; malfunction due to falling rocks, leaking roof, or mudslides; excessive use of percussive maintenance techniques; demonic possession; broken glass; disk failure or accidental file deletions; forest fires; vampire infestations; exposure to Vogon poetry; zombie-related damage; vehicular collision with a deer or any other Terran or non-Terran lifeform; cloaking device failure; milk coming out of your nose due to laughing while drinking; exposure to triaxially modulated chronoton, polaron, or tetryon beams; inadvertent viewing of a Keane painting; temporal displacement or alternate timeline incursions; loss of structural integrity due to stresses arising from gravimetric shear waves; hyperdrive malfunctions or subspace anomalies; Klingon, Romulan, Cardassian, Ferengi, Borg, Stormtrooper, Minbari, Drakh, or Shadow assaults; or damage or malfunction caused by projectile impact, which may include, but are not limited to, the following: arrows, bullets, BBs, shrapnel, lasers, or bowling balls; plummeting safes, cannonballs, anvils, or other objects of primarily ferrous composition on either freefall or ballistic trajectories; hideous tchotchkes from your grandmother's knicknack shelf, hypervelocity railgun projectiles, lawn gnomes, or torpedoes; any sort of radiation including but not limited to UV, X-ray, alpha, beta, gamma, delta, or epsilon radiation; neutral particle beams containing matter, antimatter, or any mixture of the two; kinetic kill vehicles, neutrinos, gravitons, knives, sticks, stones, ASAT missiles, tachyons, or any other material or immaterial object posessing an intrinsic momentum capable of being transmitted to a target.

And stop playing with that! You'll put out an eye, fer gossakes!

Memories:

1 entry

Interests:

29: 70's rock, 80's music, babylon 5, beards, bears, bodybuilding, bowling, classical music, disney, disneyland, gay bears, gays, hairy chests, heinlein, linux, men, monty python, movies, mst3k, os x, reading, science fiction, science fiction writing, sex, sf movies, unix, weightlifting, writing, x-files

Schools:

None listed

Friends:

	32:	algebear, beardoc, bigreddee, bigredwojo, bikerbearmark, cowboygreg, danthered, djmrswhite, dr_scott, e_ticket, excessor, fidgetcub, furr_a_bruin, furrbear, jkusters, keanubear, orangecrush206, pilosus, poohbearjim, qbear, redbear666, rootbeer1, ryx, scottybear, shadowcub, simonbear, subwoofr, teelo, uspinmeround, vaneramos, woofcub, writing_phule
	2:	engrish, shirtless_bears
	2:	ca_getfuzzy, onion_pisces